In Memory

My wonderful Dad died of cancer on 24th March and his funeral was held on the 12th April.

It sounds corny, but I haven't just lost my Dad, I've lost a friend too. As an only-child, Mum, Dad and I have always been such a close unit, and after caring for my Dad since his diagnosis, and especially since he came out of hospital in November, our bond grew even stronger. The sense of loss is overwhelming, he has left a very big gap in our little family.

In his excellent book 'Things The Grandchildren Should Know', Mark Oliver Everett talks about his Mum's fight with cancer; "It wasn't just that she had died, but the way she died. Watching her fall apart slowly over the last few months was bad enough, but the rapid decline of her last night was so horrifying that I can't allow myself to think about it for more than a second". It is part-reassuring, part-sickening reading something I can now relate to so thoroughly. 'Horrifying' is a very apt word for the effects of cancer. It is heartbreaking watching someone you love battle this vicious disease and deteriorate in front of you. The impact of terminal cancer is still something which isn't really talked about or understood. Perhaps if it was discussed rather than whispered about, more effective support methods for cancer patients and their families could be found.

My Dad was a true gentleman in every sense of the word and a real inspiration. He remained strong in spirit and completely dignified throughout and didn't once complain. I am so proud to be his daughter and I can only hope that some of his determination has rubbed off on me.

I have been thinking of starting a blip for some time, and it felt like a good time to give it a go. After putting our lives on hold for the last six months, we now have the unbearable task of trying to adapt to life without Dad here, but we will never stop thinking of him or talking about him xxx