Interview with a skeleton....

Me: Bony, I must say you are looking spectacular today and the blue of your new hat brings out the beautiful colour of your eyes!

Bony: What are you after, you old cow?!

Me: Well that's charming I must say! I just fancied a chat with my favourite skeleton and you are being mean to me... *sob*

Bony: Forget those crocodile tears! I know your little feathered friends weren't in the mood today for you and your one eyed monster and you are stuck for a blip, aren't you?

Me: Oh OK I admit it but you are very popular out there and it's about time I gave everyone an update on your latest news.

Bony: (With a sigh) Go on then. But you'll have to take me to the bathroom afterwards as I could do with a tinkle as I haven't been since 1944. *wink* You can hold my thingy as I've got arthritis in my fingers!

Me: (My turn to sigh) You know you have turned into Albert Steptoe? You're a dirty old man!

Bony: Excellent first question! Well I am a bit of a rag and BONES man!

Me: I'll ignore that one. Now then. Here's a serious one for you. On Twitter this afternoon, @Blipfoto asked Tweeters what they liked to do once a day. What would your answer be? Oi! A clean answer will suffice thank you!

Bony: How dare you! Don't judge me by your own low standards! HUMPH!

Me: OK, OK! Keep your ..err.. hair on!

Bony: Bearing in mind it's all a bit hypothetical with me of course, there are loads of things I'd like to do every day. I'd like to run down the road without dogs chasing me thinking I'm something to chomp on. I'd like to drink a pint of Abbot Ale without it pouring all over the carpet and I'd love to eat a peanut without it bouncing off my ribs all night like someone playing the xylophone! I'd like to go out and feed the birds without a magpie trying to fly off with my eyeballs and you know what else I'd like?

Me: Go on *me impressed*

Bony: Well, I haven't had a shag since 1964......

Me: Oh sod it! Typical!

Track? I'm in the mood for The Rolling Stones - Satisfaction