Incoming Tide

There are warnings of Germs in Forth and Cromarty.

Coughing increasing later and imminent. Visibility is likely to be poor due to tissue avalanches in all neighbouring areas.

Nose blowing is predicted to read Force Six, and rising although kitchen roll will be employed since all the tissues are finished.

Temperatures may fall at bedtime if the Electric Blanket is not switched on in time.In which case a Major Tantrum warning is expected, likely to veer severely and standard advice is to remain calm and ignore.



Sailing by.