At Least They Said Please

Those of us who carry peanuts in our pockets and scatter them unobtrusively around the courthouse knew this day would come. It’s the perfect bureaucratic project because the squirrels are such easy targets even though the list of things that need attention around the government buildings is long. There were probably several meetings to discuss the signs, their design and placement which explains why there was no time left to discuss the signs that prohibit public parking in the Judges’ parking spots which have faded to the point they can no longer be read.

We, the squirrel enablers, know that if we were to ask the question “why?” there would be no logical answer. If we could even find the correct person to ask we’d likely get tangled in the proverbial red tape and it would take years to get that answer.

In seven years I don’t think I’ve ever seen more than 6 squirrels on the grounds at one time. I suppose there may be more and if they’re nesting in the vents or chewing through phone lines, then I’d understand, but I don’t think that’s the case. I think somebody just needed a project. I hope they’re prepared to monitor the cameras, hire extra security guards and frisk us for peanut shells because we aren’t going to be deterred so easily. A squirrel in need of a peanut is a strong incentive to be creative.

Oh, and crows have been included in the ban, but don't get me started on that.