Echt

Maidstone is throbbing with excitement today. There are two, count them, TWO, big events. The first is that the Christmas lights are being switched on by some big slebs who I'd not recognise if we were sharing a telephone box . One appears in something about factory production in SW3 and the other two are an American couple who appeared in a televised talent competition. The reason I don't know these folk is that I am old but with age comes memories - as children we'd be taken to Talbot Square to see a star of the day; I remember seeing Ken Dodd one year, switch on the Blackpool Hallucinations. Maidstone sadly doesn't have 6 miles of seafront, a tower and a handful of piers. They have got traditional food stalls though and - as you'll see here - they are offering local delicacies like bratwurst and bratkartoffeln. My German must be a bit off because when I greeted the stall-holder with "Gruess Gott" she looked nonplussed. I didn't dine as I was off to do a visit.

The light-switching-on event is running from 16.00 to 21.00 but it all sounds a bit too rich for my blood.

'Wait', I hear you cry, 'you promised us two events!' And this I did dear readers.

This evening, kicking off in a few minutes time, Maidstone United will be replaying their FA Cup first round game after a tie at Stevenage. It's a sell-out of course and the local media suggested that demand was three times capacity (which is 2,226). I hope they do well because a big team tackling the one-way system and playing on the 21st C astro turf would fruede mich