I guess grieving is a huge part of my life now, not only I cry inside for mum, I also cry for dad … I've got my own beautiful family where both parents were witnessing and supporting me getting married and welcoming my both ray of lights … I should be more positive … Instead I worry about Christmas and how will be without both of them this time. I went to see my doctor today, she insisted me start taking antidepressant and some relaxing tablets to allow my body to take it easy in the next coming months … she signed me off for another 2 months and urged to pay attention to my MBSR (Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction) course I have started 2 weeks ago … I enjoy it so far and I have to do a 40min body scan every day + some 15min sitting meditation. We both hope this will help me :)

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ps. got myself a cheerful little present - mint second hand Sigma 17-70mm f2.8 on Ebay, it has arrived in no time and I'm already enjoying our time together.