Feeding the wrong animal?

I was completely drained after the meeting with my lawyer yesterday. I felt sick to my stomach and was in pain again. Not only mental but also physical pain. So when I came home from launching Joni's boat last night I straight away saw Timo. He went to the shower and was cocky enough to walk naked from the bathroom. I asked him kindly that if it would be possible to put something on him in these circumstances. He agreed to do so in the future.

I was rubbed in the wrong way and started asking him questions about his new woman. I did so even if I had decided NOT to go on that path. I found out more lies. And all this just hurt me so much more. I started crying hopelessly and felt all my energy just vanishing. I thought that I'd throw up and I was shaking. So THIS is what happens when you feed the wrong animal!

After I'd cried and let everything out again I found some peacefulness. So when I talked to Barbro today she said that maybe it was not feeding the bad animal after all, maybe it just was a part of the process.

Today I was biking and walking in Espoon keskuspuisto. It was a wonderful summer day. When I photograph and see all the beauty of the summer I'm definitely feeding the right animal. I can experience short moments of refuge.

P.S. I have asked Timo to move out, and he will. We need to sort out a few things, but he has admitted that this is unbearable for both of us. So things are progressing.