Hillary meets yer da in the Carnoustie primaries

So the conversation (at least in my head) would go something like this:

HC (Hillary Clinton): Oh ma goad Shug, is that a Greggs ower there?
YD (Yer Da): whar?
HC: Ower there, ir ye blind? Ahend thon golf trolley
YD: Ya beezir, well spoatit. Ah didna think they hud thum up here in the sticks
HC: Gon nip ower an git is a cheese an ingin pastie an a steak bake. Ah'm gaspin'. Here, tak a pearl diver and git yersel somehin tae
YD: Barry, diet iron bru fir yersel hen or foo fat?
HC: F@@k it we lost the Arbroath bi's mak if foo fat an a stra'

SIC (stranger in crowd): Hillary hen go'an pose fir ma moaby
HC: whit? Why the hell shid ah?
SIC: Go'an hen, a bought a caird the ither day fae her shop in the St James Centre. A quiltit Clintin Cairds special it wiz. Cost is shree ninty nine
HC: Barry thats anither fower quid fir ma election campain in the till. Gie'in ye the thumbs up mate, flash awa wi yer moaby....