Agent 00-Dog Application

Good evening, I wish to apply for your recent vacancy for Agent 00Dog. I shall begin by listing my talents:

1) gives one, two or both paws on request
2) I wait and say please for my breakfast & dinner
3) there will be no intruders- postmen beware!
4) If I do something wrong, I'll get in my bed before you catch me (every time)
5) I'll even face-bath the cat when you're not looking
6) If i'm half asleep I'll bed-bark, just so you know i'm still guarding

Please see enclosed photo of my best trick

Tag line: failure is not an option