'Fags and Booze'

Today I have developed a way of shopping that will guarantee that I feel no guilt when I want to purchase goods for myself.

Years ago I stopped drinking alcohol. Last year I stopped smoking. I know, very dull, very weird. Anyway, as I no longer spend money on these luxury items, I shall be be using them as a form of 'imaginary currency'. Here are some examples:

1 haircut = 1 months supply of cigarettes.

Fly London shoes (ones I've felt too guilty to buy) = 1 months supply cigarettes+2 bottles of wine.

1 pair of jeans (TKMAXX) = 1 packet of cigarettes

1 scarf + Rimmel nail polish = one packet of ciggs + 1 bottle of wine.

I feel better already. I'm just off the Breahead before my meeting.