Mr Kafka, we have been expecting you

The outskirts of Moscow.
Swipe cards in, swipe cards out (your photo flashes up on the guard's screen as you enter - though he is reading a magazine).
A deserted university, the sixth floor.
Room G604.

The surreal experience deepens as the lecturer treats us to a full-on Hegelian analysis of civilisation, from the agrarian revolution, through the legal developments of Athens and Rome, to a strongly-held position on Russian uniqueness ('we can never be like Luxembourg - happy simply to make money, live comfortably, and eat well: we are used to something different').

Via a short geography lesson (Russia is all either permafrost, impenetrable taiga, or hostile steppe), he detours to explain why Ukrainian pro-independence scholars are all mistaken, before concluding with his own thesis, that Russia's democracy is irremediably weakened by its natural resources, which prevent it escaping big business interests.

3 hours later we stumble out, exhausted. Though tired, I was sure I saw FK himself being led somewhere: I didn't quite catch him on camera though.