I'm sorry, but if they thought I would be tensing and relaxing my buttocks and thighs in full view of the male, or female, blood donors in the town hall today, then they had another think coming. I did discreeetly give it a go, wondering if it might be a good weight/diet strategy, but the concentrated look, which I felt was evident on my face, clenched cheek (excuse the pun) muscles, I thought gave the game away. I decided instead to clench my fist in time to the pumping donation and be done with it.

Another new idea, drinking a pint of cold water on arrival, would apparently "help recovery". It didn't help me as I was just desperate for a pee afterward, having to forego the free tea and gulp down a cold drink before escaping back to work and the loo!