What is one to Doo?

"Quite smart, the new bird table. Better than last year's plastic plate balancing on top of the snow so that the fox gets the lot. It's great for those silly wee toaty birds; they think christmas has come two months early. And I suppose it frustrates the hell out of those poisonous magpies: that was probably why she got it.

However missus; we have a problem here. I've tried turning upside down and swinging over the seeds .... doesnae work! Tried getting in under the roof .... too hard!

I know fine well that you're standing at that window! I can see you! So OK .... what's the answer?"