Day 1 - Log Cabin weekend

We book each year to a log cabin place ran by the forrestry commision and today we plan to head off to Callander as our accomodation this year is located on the banks of Loch Lubnaig.

On the way there though, we stop in at Mcdonalds for the children and after we are served and seated a little girl about Ruby's age keeps looking over, smiling, laughing and trying to wave at Ruby.

Well for some reason Ruby has her taxi driver face on and seriously if looks could kill they would say "you looking at me, you looking at me etc etc" Except the little girl wont take a hint and Im concerned that left unnatended Ruby might go and stick her Nugget somewhere that a Happy Meal shouldnt go.

Connie seems totally oblivious to the fact that Ruby has rage face on and that the little girl at the adjacent table may well be Mcckicken strangled any minute. Luckily, Ruby becomes distracted by an extra portion of sweet and sour sauce and the fact that the happy meal has a toy tintin telescope in it. All is well that ends well, but seriously I was concerned for the little girls health and wellbeing through most of the time that it took me to eat a Big Mac (Royale with Cheese).

Driving along the motorway to Stirling and suddenly a freak storm of hailstorms came battering down, they were like golf balls falling from the sky, it only lasted for about half a mile but there was a point that you couldnt see your hand in front of your face.

On the point of golf balls, my right eye feels like it has a golf ball stuck in it as I seem to have some sort of sty or something to go along with my man cold that just isnt budging.

We stop in a Dobies garden centre for a cup of coffee and emerse ourselves in all things Christmas and I was almost tempted to part with the princely sum of £12 for a bag of Cinnamon scented pine cones. Hmm, I can almost still smell them, (not surprising really as they were in a massive display and it was strong even through my cold filled nostrils.)

We finally make it to the log cabin, through quite honestly the worst pot holed access road that I have ever had the misfortune to drive along without a four wheel drive and we check into our cabin.

However, Connie makes me go an complain about the hot tub, which she thinks is inadequate as the button marked "Jet 2" doesn't work and as she so rightly puts it "youve paid for this cabin". Not wanting to fault her womanly logic in anyway, I go and do what im told. The forest ranger man explains that the "Jet 2" button was never a working feature on this model of hot tubs since they got them. Looks like your going to have to cope with just "Jet 1" then Con'.

I get home after falling in ankle deep to the worlds largest pot hole that doesnt appear on an ordnance survey map to discover that since I've been away the other forest ranger women has already been at the door and explained to Connie that it is only "jet 1" that does anything practical. Magic, so I just walked half a mile in the pitch black, howling wind, chucking rain and then fell ankle deep in a cavers paradise for nothing then ?

However, it also turns out that despite having one of the artificial logs that you light the corners of the paper wrapper to light, Connie has somehow managed to attempt this and miraculously ignite all the paper without actually setting fire to the log. This has to be some sort of skill, somebody somewhere probably got a Blue Peter badge for less than this, her logic being of course was that she was cold and I was "away for ages".

So there I am, soaking ankle, man cold, not been in the hot tub yet, trying to get the matches to light on an artificial brickett with the lighting paper burned away and then I have to suffer Eastenders.

We have invited our friends Graham and Iris up for the evening to bask in our Jet Oneness, so we await there arrival.