Christmas Eve

and I think something of the magic of it is getting through to Ben :)

Before I go any further, thankyou SO much for all the encouraging words left on yesterday's blip. It's a huge encouragement to know that there is light at the end of the tunnel, and that I'm not the only one to be going through it or have gone through it, and that it really is worth the effort in these early days. It may not have been a better night last night in terms of sleep, but it certainly wasn't as stressful! More on that later.

Ben was very excited about putting out one of daddy's socks for Father Christmas this evening before bed. We gave it to Mr Snowman (who sits at the foot of his bed) to look after. I told him that Father Christmas goes round collecting all the presents that people have wrapped up, and makes sure they get delivered to the right houses and the right children. (As opposed to he makes the toys, and the presents are actually from him. And none of this good list / naughty list!) I doubt he'll stay in his own bed all night so I've taken the sock's twin downstairs to fill, and before Ben gets up in the morning we'll remove the empty sock from Mr Snowman....

I think he might get a bit excited if Father Christmas also leaves an extra sock for Charley!


Last night's sleepover didn't go swimmingly, I forget where I left off in the blip but Steve ended up in Ben's bed (yes, up in the cabin bed!) and it took many plays of Twinkle Twinkle to get Ben off to sleep. But all three boys were sleeping when I left the room, sadly Charley woke up on the way downstairs... All I needed was to get him settled then I could have my insulin and go to bed myself. All jobs were done! It took a while, and a fair bit of puking from Charley (he's used to going to sleep of an evening on Steve so doesn't normally get a lot of milk so he was taking in way more than he was used to and then puking it back up. Ah well) before the insulin was in and I headed off upstairs with camera and tripod to get a sneaky snap of the boys fast asleep!! Very cute :)

They joined me and Charley in the small hours but it was enough for me to have had a proper relax and a bit of a sleep beforehand. I was ready this time though - I've said this before (even on blip ha) about how amazed I am at how SLOW I am sometimes! I need to make time for Ben, and I need to make sure I include him as well. So we had a tandem cuddle and I Ben was happy enough, and didn't go into meltdown, and we survived til morning.

Today has been the first proper "weekend" Saturday that I can remember having in I can't think how long!!! Months probably! No visitors, no agenda. Ben and Steve went downstairs at 8am and left me and Charley and I asleep until nearly 10am. Bliss!! Pancakes (eventually, after sending Steve out to Tesco for eggs) for breakfast (which Ben ate more of than me, stealing mine all the time), after lunch there was a bath for me and then also for Charley as he joined me in the water. After his initial fury at having actual water touch his actual skin he decided that actually it wasn't that bad after all and actually seemed to quite like it. He relaxed so much that he pooed without any strain at all (lovely! Must get a nylon sieve to keep by the bath) and was more upset at bathtime being over than at getting in in the first place. He was almost falling asleep in the bath, and once he was dried and moisturised and dressed he was very dozy and chilled out so we decided to get wrapped up and go for a walk into town to get the nappies that we were about to run out of.

Ben was evidently utterly worn out by the 20 minute bike ride home that he was in bed and asleep by 8pm!!

Baked camembert for supper YUM and logs on the fire - first time this year - and presents under the tree and front room tidied and stockings filled (well, Ben's is done anyway). Dishwasher to stack and insulin to have and bed to find.

And, who'd've thunk it, I'm actually enjoying the Star Trek movie!!