Any Other Night

Tonight is like any Tuesday night. Work, stop at the deli for some chicken and home to watch NCIS. Why does it not feel like any other night?

Missed my blip yesterday. It was my first thought this morning. That I forgot. Can't even back-blip. I flashed back to a conversation with a friend, who when I told her I was posting a pic a day, asked me what would happen if I missed at a day. I told her, "Nothing, it's a personal commitment". She said, "I couldn't take the pressure". My response, "Oh, there's no pressure".

Right.

Huge gap between the idea of the kind of pictures I would be posting and what I am actually able to do. Experience, opportunity, time, skill, other commitments...

Not too many days ago, I stopped bringing my camera with me in the morning because despite best intentions, I end up wandering around the house in the evening searching for inspiration. Confidentiality issues and no free time to go about taking pictures of co-workers keep photos at work to zero and then it's into the car and straight home. Made sense to just leave it. One less thing to haul.

Ended up waking up with no picture at all, not even a bad one.

Truth is, photographers take pictures. With every picture I learn something about myself, about how I see the world, about what's important to me. Maybe the exposure is less than perfect and the subject less than perfectly captured or only interesting to me....

Error: not bringing the camera with me in the morning. I see the world around me differently if I know there is the possibility of taking a picture. No camera leads to no pictures, not one for a whole day.

I had such a sense of having lost something.