Contradiction

When I was that age I lived about 400 yards away, there were three, sometimes four, of us and the smallest always tended to be the goalie...and you have to have some pity for him.

and then through a different filter...

It seems to me to be a wholly consistent cock up for Edinburgh to have a no ball games sign above a set of goals painted onto someone's wall....great excuse though.

polis: ye cannae play fitba' here lads
player 1: why no'?
polis: causey the sign there
player 2: what dis it say?
polis: nae ba' games, that means nae fitba'. can ye no read?
player 1: naw ah cannae, ahm only four years auld. if we arnae allowed tae play here why did yes paint goalposts?
polis: it wis the cooncil's idea, that's art that is
player 2: is the cooncil daft? why wid they dae something like that?

and i suppose that you can add your own answer or, hopefully, exaggerated continuation as you please....

ps. once again i think that big is better