THE BEST DAYS OF OUR LIVES

(Thai takeaway last night.)

I took my 'O'-levels shortly before my 16th birthday in the summer of '67 (Sgt Pepper; Summer of Love), in Singapore at a new comprehensive school for the children of UK servicemen and civilians. (Look, there's me at Sports Day that year! I came last at 400m, shotput, javelin and something else that I don't recall because it was too humiliating, but might have involved some form of jumping.)

It was a strange mix of traditional discipline and a few progressive ideas. There was corporal punishment; boys' hair had to be above the collar at the back and girls' hemlines no higher than 4 inches above the knee (and the deputy head would stand at the door of the Hall, even at school dances, with a ruler and anyone who didn't meet the standard would be sent home to change - or get a haircut). On the other hand, the prefects had a smoking room.

In those days there was no study leave for exams, and we had to stay on afterwards until the end of term. We had a lovely pool and fantastic sports facilities, and the staff devised various activities to entertain a bunch of bored and slightly resentful 15-to-19 year olds. At some stage somebody must have thought it would be an excellent educational opportunity to take a coachload of us on a visit to the Tiger Brewery. And somebody must have thought it would be a really good idea to let Mr D. - a well-known alcoholic (well-known to us kids, at least) - take charge.

The staff at the Brewery showed us round - it was all very interesting - and then without a qualm took us through to the hospitality lounge. Their hospitality was boundless, and I don't recall how we got back to the coach and back to school. I do remember that Mr D. was in a worse state than anyone else. There were a few hours before we had to get the buses home, so I was a bit more compos mentis by the time I got home, and I don't think my parents ever knew.

In fact, as far as I can remember, I don't think there were ever any repercussions at all (except that the Tiger Brewery may never have accepted school parties again).

Then again, it was the Sixties.