Sk8r boy

Arlo got invited to Jack's 3rd birthday party today (only his 5th invite this month) and it was to be held at The Space in Nth Berwick, an absolutely amazing indoor skate park place. Needless to say - Arlo absolutely loved it.

For the parents, though, it should be re-named 'heart attack land', really - I spent most of the time with my head in my hands and my heart in my mouth as Arlo stood at the top of a massive ramp, his wee scooter ready to rumble and a look of sheer determination on his face - ready to nail it.

Me: so, what are you thinking of doing up here, Arlo?

Arlo: (looking at me like I am an idiot) Well, you see, to go down here on my scooter, Mummy

Me: standing up? on your feet?

Arlo (looking at me with pity): eh, no - on my scooter, silly Mummy. Byeeeee

And off he'd go. Absolutely NO fear. Taking it in his stride as I suppressed a scream and a deep rooted desire to grab his collar so he couldn't move anywhere.

I realised that soon enough; his safety won't really be my responsibility. Well, it will be, but I won't really get any say in it and I'll have to take responsibility for it from afar. Without very much control at all.

He'll be the one deciding what to do with those once chubby wee knees, his hands and feet that we used to call 'the doofers' because they were so chubby and round will be climbing things, pedalling things, taking risks on walls and fences. His big eyes and smooshy little face of his toddler days will crease into laughter with his defined cheekbones and deep laugh of a teenager, a young adult and then, a man.

Its too hard to think of those future days -
almost like my heart will shatter at the thought of THIS Arlo no longer being around me.

So for now, I'll sit back and enjoy this boy at the beginning of his future - his baby days are behind him and whatever lies ahead, we'll experience it together. I'll try to take my lead from him. You know, NO fear. Gulp.

My boy. My one and only x