March Heatwave

And lo it came to pass that it was very hot for the time of year and in Edinburgh even the haar cleared away out of decency.

And the people said unto themselves "C'mon let's kid on it's really summer and it's never going to be cold again!"

And therefore it was decreed that the signifiers of summer should instantly appear:-

Attractive young men in crushed linen trousers (deliberately crushed or just non-ironing young men?)

Unattractive men who immediately whipped their T-shirts off to reveal an enormous white belly flopping, stretch-marked, over depressed waistband.

A saxophone busker who plays "Take Five" not too badly in the distance

Young women wearing last year's flatties with their bare feet and complaining about their bleeding (literally) heels

Other young women of assorted sizes wearing black holey tights under romper suits so short last week's breakfast is visible

Hot eight-month-old babies screaming blue murder, trying to get their sunbathing mum to turn the buggy away from the sun on their scarlet little face

A Park warden speaking into his walkie talkie thus "Hello this is Xray 99 in the Gardens!"

And lo! The people were happy and smiled at each other, even tho' it was Edinburgh where it's punishable by death to smile at a stranger!