Another shot on the sly.
Another pack of strange choices.
Off we shot to Carlisle in the middle of the night ... 09:00 kick off.
Volvo wrought a goodly wreak on the ''old bus'': managed to let us off with a free M.O.T. and ''End of warranty service'' and still set us back close on 400 notes, over 60 of which was Very Awful Tax.
We got the freedom of the city in the form of a loan car. One of those weird and wonderful contraption where you stuff a lump of plastic bigger than a dog biscuit into a hole like a letter-box then press a ''Start'' button. It also has the good sense to stop its engine in queues. The really weird bit came when I took the dog biscuit out of the letter-box and said ''Are my lights still on?'' Not only were they, but the engine was still running and I had to press the ''Stop'' button.
Cue for a song? ''Evrything's up to date in Carlisle city.''
Toddle around town, got a Town's womens' Guild meeting on the steps of this column, cuppa in Marks & Spencer's (NOT M&S) where I shot a Lambretta amidst the gents togs, then this young lady mystified by mirror.
Next up to Houghton garden centre for a salad and wander round to kill time.
Two potential blips there were a ginormous liony sort of statue with the ridiculous price tag of, would you believe, £1999.99P?
Also in contention were two packs of seed potatoes.
One, reputedly, good for ''Salad O, Boil /, Bake /, Roast /, Chip O, Mash /.''
The other boasting as .... ''Salad O, Boil O, Bake /, Roast /, Chip O, Mash /.''
Which, being me, inspired the (unasked) question ''Please Sir, how do you mash them without boiling them 1st?''
Another aside. The pesky software has, obviously, never met a Sq. root sign, so the intended ticks ended as ???s, just as it does when I put one '' instead of two ' side-by-side.
:¬((
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