The dementors affect you more than others because there are true horrors in your past. You are not weak, Harry - Professor RJ Lupin

The last few days I have felt the urge to explain to other people why my grandmother passing away affects me so much, and why it makes me so sad. But I decided I don't care what other people might think, just like I normally don't care.

Yesterday I went to my aunt and uncle to have dinner together, and ended up helping with the planning of the service in the church on Thursday, together with some relatives (hope I get all the translations of these churchs things right, I'm not even familiar with it in Dutch..).

Pastor James (a very serious looking young man from India) came over to help us with the preparations of the service. It felt good to be able to do something, to help, even though it was emotionally exhausting.

Today I'm tired, so I told my boss I was staying home, as my whole body was screaming it needed rest. It has been a while since I endured pain like this. Luckily my boss agreed this was a wise thing to do as she needs me to be at work tomorrow for an inportant experiment.