Mixed Emotions

This is Pecker.  He's my nephew's budgie.  Mum and I went to visit them this afternoon with my sister, who's his mother (my nephew's, that is, not Pecker's).  My nephew has had a spell in hospital recently but thankfully he was discharged in time for Christmas.  He developed extremely painful sciatica in his leg, and has just undergone surgery to have two discs trimmed and spacers put in his spine.  I had a similar operation about twenty years ago, so I know what agony he has been in.  Also, the pain doesn't go away immediately after the operation but takes many months to recede, because it's caused by crushed nerves which only recover very slowly.

Pecker came out of his cage to play with us for a while, which really cheered us all up.  He's so cheeky, and I'm convinced my nephew has trained him to perch on my sister's head because that's where he flew as soon as he was out in the room.  He also flips coins and pens around the floor and was very attracted to Mum's shiny gold specs, which he couldn't manage to flip because they're much heavier than he is.  I could feel a certain warmth when Pecker sat on my knee, and sure enough when he flitted off he'd left a little something behind on my jeans - ahem.  He really is a very naughty little bird indeed.

Taking such delight in Pecker was a welcome respite from our grief.  My nephew in particular idolised my Dad.  He and my sister came on holiday with my parents and me many years ago when he was about nine or ten.  In every single photograph of Dad on that holiday, there is my nephew right by his Grandad's side.  Dad used to refer to it as "me and my shadow".  My nephew and his fiancée visited Dad in Colchester Hospital many, many times during his weeks there, and they both thought the world of him.  They came to be with us at the hospital a week ago, very soon after he had passed away.

I'm grateful for small diversions like dear little Pecker and his antics.  He might not be able to lift a pair of glasses, but for a short while he was able to lift the heaviness from our hearts.