Walking home, just as I turned off the main road a car dived past me and stopped in the dark. Bloke pissed against gate, bloke pissed on road, lass pissed on pavement on bridge. Had to just carry on walking past. Bloke pissing on road waved his beer can at me in friendly greeting.

Instead, here's a picture from Hazel's college. They have this kind of thing just lying around.