Who knew?

By InOtherNews

Yellow

cue Coldplay link. Not a song I was particularly fussed about though.

This is a field close to my house which is great for keeping my hayfever suffering friends away in the autumn. However I don't have many hayfever suffering friends. I don't actually have many people who visit to be honest, it's a fair way out and until last weekend my living room smelled constantly of stale tobacco. Not now. I have now been (still) smoke free for two hundred and forty hours and I could murder a fag have never felt better. I despise tobacco and all that it stands for. I hate being made to want something I don't want - like cheap advertising ploys annoy me as well.

Just as I say that an advert is on the tv (on in the background obviously) referring to anti smoking. They're recommending a nicotine mouth spray. I can't imagine that is very nice, I once inadvertently got some baccy in my mouth and frankly it taste of dry dirt.

I once had a girlfriend who ate some turkish strawberry flavoured tobacco because she thought it would actually be strawberry flavoured. Apparently it had a hint of strawberry mixed (at first) with dry dirt and (latterly) vomit.

In other news I just heard the line 'you couldn't even cheat on me with a proper woman, you chose a lesbian' spoken by a girl who appears to be 12 on a soap opera that once revolved around farming. I can't help but think televisual standards have dropped. I stress that I don't watch this regularly, it's just I have my lounge windows open giving it an 'airing' and I have to sit in the room to ensure a pikey doesn't climb through my windows and steal some of my shit.

Wow actually it has been a while since I watched this. It appears that the local vicar has been defrocked (or whatever it is) for slapping about his OAP old man. There is also a dark eyeshadowed Geordie bullying an inane middle aged cafe worker and a young girl who's (already mentioned) boyfriend made a move on his mothers (yes, mothers) partner who is much older, and a scouser. Her (the young girl, not the scouser lass) Dad is under lock and key for talking to dead people on the moors and her brother is a gap toothed simpleton who personfies everything that is bad about country stereotypes.


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