Slow Day

It was a slow day today. Saw some patients in the hospital (including one we were surprised we didn't hear yelling down the hallway when we walked out), but otherwise spent most of the rest of the day talking in the doctors' break room. It's always interesting to me to see people in new situations, and today was full of that. Former resident all graduated and in her own clinic. My former WHNP sitting around talking shop. A third year just starting her OB/GYN rotation. My attending the ballet dancer. After I got released early I went home and practiced knot trying, because "we shouldn't stop practicing" (and I probably need more practice than most). This little strand had some nice pretty stretches of symmetry though, so I'm going to gift it to my attending. (Plus it's purple - her favorite color.) 

Back to the Future 

Doctor,

I'm your fourth year self weeks away from The Match all full of uncertainty and anxiety about what the rest of my life will look like. You're past all that - running your clinic, being the small town doctor at all the games, covering the ED, delivering babies. But you're also bogged down in the business of medicine, in a way I have yet to experience. Everyday the pile of paperwork on your desk grows by an inch it seems - medical device order forms, consults, dictations, pathology and lab reports, radiology reports, prior authorizations, insurance denials, pharmacy communications, and the simple ordering of office supplies. I'm sure there are days when it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel; the way it used to be hard to see the light at the end of first and second year. But I'm at a point now where  the light is so bright it is almost blinding. I want you to remember for at a least a minute of everyday the important parts of your patients' lives you have been a part of - the joy on a new mother's face through all the exhaustion of labor, the tears on the faces of loved ones gathered around a hospice patient's bed, the relief on a parent's face when their child's broken arm is casted and their pain is controlled, the treatment successes and failures, the times you trusted your gut and were right (or wrong but you learned for the next one). In short, don't let yourself forget that they are the reason we do what we do. I'll leave you with this: Patients come to the doctor because they are unhappy about something. If the physician isn't happy then they can't hope to help their patients. 

- Student Doctor