Internal monologue

Some shaggin' hero, I tell you... But of course the Uzi was going to jam. Any aul eedjit will tell you that much. The Uzi is for them showoffy gangsta rap dudes. Sprout Brussels Sprout or that One Punt Fifty guy. No, a real pro goes for the AK47. Not much street cred, but good old solid Russian gear. I'd have that dreadful Taliban hostage taker shot between the eyes, no questions asked, the primary school kids freed by 9.30am, maybe a kiss from their teacher, and back in the office for the 10am tea break. Tuesday is blueberry muffins. An Uzi, I ask you... Some shaggin' hero all right...