Mood Measuring Machine

Lincoln City Council has thoughtfully installed these clever gizmos in every lift in every multi storey in town.

They enable you to watch your heart sink lower and lower as you travel closer and closer down to the ground level and the time for trudging round the shops gets nearer and nearer.

My mission today was to find costumes for the ginger thespian's theatre show on Saturday. The list says muted rustic tones. Muted rustic tones my arse! Because high street shops are just falling all over themselves to sell 12 year old boys clothes in mustard and brown. It's enough to make George Clooney's mum reach for the gin!