Cultural Icons No 54 - Fourteen Quid

Having been pursued relentlessly by a national company for debt, I decided to pay up . After all, who wants to look a fool.
The letters from debt collectors suggesting bad credit rating were easy to ignore, I have that anyway. The personal calls from debt collection agencies were polite and even kind.
Then came the automated calls with invites to contact various companies to pay off my debt. Even these were polite in that they started at 9am and usually stopped around 5pm. Even debt collection agency staff work office hours.
After a few weeks though the pressure was increased. Suggestions of a bad credit rating were replaced with offers of goods sold to pay off the debt, men at my door, women at my door, my name in the public domain as a debtor and worst of all, an action in the Sheriff Court!
Time to give up justice, pay the bill and move on.
Sent a cheque for the full amount asked for to the address requested by the debt collection agency. End of matter.
My payment was returned by Royal Mail in an envelope embossed with "mailbox no longer rented".
I ask you!
How many virgins does it take to change a light bulb?