Jamón Jamón

Yesterday I wrote about the blue blue tower of Glasgow University against the sky. That double barreled adjective. Like Burn's sublime red, red rose there is something in the concentration of it that tries to touch the very thing itself.
When I lived in Spain this was a common thing they did.

¿Has probado ese jamón?

Sí

No es jamón. ¡Es jamón jamón!

What is being said here by the double emphasis is that the thing is the absolute epitome of what - in this instance - ham, should be.

So, today I start back at work properly and I get to thinking about the things that are lacking and the things I want to put right. How can I be Gordon Gordon ?
There are people - some here on Blipfoto - that I admire and wish I was more like. Often, I think if I was more like them then I'd be more contented and the good stuff in life would drift towards me. But would I be being Gordon Gordon?
The difficulty, indeed I think the whole purpose, in life is in embracing oneself, and I am forever in awe of those who do so. I am never sure what myself really looks like so I aspire to things that I think I would like to become.
The problem is that just because I want to be more like someone doesn't mean that I'll be happier. It won't necessarily make me Gordon Gordon. I don't want to recognise and embrace the parts of me I don't particularly like. I want to hand pick this idealised notion of the perfect me:  the Gordon Gordon of my mind.
And so I suffer, because this isn't Gordon Gordon at all, it's -insert some other person's name - Gordon. If I want to resonate truly in this life - become Gordon Gordon - then I have to recognise the parts that make me 'me' whether I like it or not.

¿me entiende?