Mantelpiece piano

So what tune would you play on this? "Goodness gracious great balls of fire"? "Smoke gets in your eyes"? Whatever you choose don't you think this is the best use of an old broken piano ever?!

We found this in a little sitting room for campers in Cahersiveen. The chap that owns the campsite said that anybody that can get a tune out of it can stay for free! Looks like we'll have to pay.