Ma dennah

I took a picture of my dinner for all you blippers, then turned round, and it was gone! I would have blamed Seamus, the dyslexic seagull, but all the windows were closed. I phoned the police and was assured by Sgt. Androcles Hosie that the Royal Highland Constabulary would leave no no stone unturned in their search for the missing plate of food . I was encouraged to hear that a reward (unspecified) would be offered for the safe return of my meal, and that Sgt. Hosie would be personally available every day of the week, barring Sunday, shinty matches and masonic congregations. You can't ask for more than that.