Off My Trolley.....

Today, I took the bus to a large supermarket on the edge of town. (Who says I have dull weekends!)

At the till, the cashier (who was at least 95, and as deaf as a thing with no ears) asked if I had a loyalty card. I explained that I'd forgotten it, but he looked mystified. So I repeated it again, slightly louder. By the fourth time he asked, I think I may have been bellowing.

Just then, someone in the adjacent queue shouted to me. It was one of my customers, Pam, who wished me a Happy New Year, and then asked, 'Have you got your card with you?' Again, I explained that I didn't. 'I can't remember where I left it,' I said. 'No, idea whatsoever. I used it last week, but haven't seen it since.' Pam frowned. 'Are you not concerned?' she asked.

Was everyone going to obsess about my loyalty card?

'It's really old and battered,' I said, 'so it honestly doesn't matter. I'll just get a lovely, shiny new one sometime.' Pam looked aghast, as though I'd said something really strange, and I tottered off to the bus stop, thinking that the entire world was a very odd place.

It wasn't until Pam pulled up in her scarlet mini, rolled down the window and said 'Are you sure you don't want a lift home?' that I had one of those rare moments of clarity.

She hadn't asked me if I had my card with me....she'd asked about my car.....

I couldn't even be bothered explaining. My brain had started melting by then......