Don't look at me.

I'm allergic to my new washing powder.
I woke up scratching like crazy.
I also woke up with a swollen top lip. It's massive.
Jordan's lips are like Dot's from Eastenders compared to this monstrosity.
Fuck it, Jordans tits pale in comparison to my top lip.

I could shelter a rugby team from the rain under this thing.

I've never exactly been the prettiest troll under the bridge, but jeez.