Good Grief 147

Reality
I could shy away from posting this but that would be to shy away from the reality.
What is 'the' reality? The one that is the hours before I even got up to a point where I took this? The one just before when I looked like this but was 'really' in 'that' reality? The moment when I thought I would blip it? The process of setting it up and that actual doing of it? And then, that is not actually the moment that it is capturing ... it is conveying the idea of that reality that had actually passed because the next reality, of taking the picture, had superseded it.

The 'shying away' is the point of the photo. All the others (photos) convey the myriad of other 'realities' that make up the peculiarly subjective world of this organism currently existing rather painfully in the world. Very few actually convey the 'bottom line' reality of completely running out of steam and paralysis that takes over. The fact of the matter is that this is the way things look at lot of the time ... the rest is taken up with weaving between trying to function, stretch, grow bludgeon, accept, and taking any other path that helps maintain some semblance of keeping going.

I was having a conversation last night about 2 people who had suffered different forms of brain injury. One who had a 20 second memory span, the other who could not remember anything before his sudden illness last October (and is I think in his 60's). There are no 'winners or losers' here - both horrific conditions. Where is the 'human' , the consciousness here? The 20 second memory has the good fortune of no awareness and exists in a state of constant human presence. The other has awareness and I suspect carries the pain of human awareness. Living with awareness (and awareness of what exactly?) can be the great consuming struggle that makes us 'fully' human (whatever that means) . or is it ... I just don't know ...
Too much thinking .... not enough living ....