An atheist goes into a synagogue ...

and says “when will these people ever learn that prayers are a total waste of effort and time? Thank God I'm an atheist". 

It’s true that old habits die hard. Fact is most of us want to believe in something and still invoke a deity or a prophet when occasion demands. Anyway, today this atheist did go to a synagogue. That’s what happens sometimes when you are married to someone who is Jewish and by happy consequence your son is therefore Jewish. His old teacher who had prepared him for his bar mitzvah five years ago was retiring from duty so we went along for the service, the lunch and to say goodbye. And it was really lovely.

Today being Yom Ha'atzmaut (the anniversary of the founding of Israel in 1948) meant that there were two themes to the services, the first being the celebration of the retiring individual, and the second Israeli national day. Israel’s very existence being a source of controversy in international political circles, there was a very measured approach to the latter which particularly acknowledged the continued difficulties with relations with the Palestinian peoples. Going so far in fact to say that Jewish people could not really be happy until this was peacefully resolved.


My experience of Jewish communities and synagogue life is hugely positive, and today was no exception. There was a big emphasis on personal growth, on caring and just being a good person. From talking to a muslim colleague earlier in the week I know that this is the normal experience of attending a mosque as well. I also have a Christian friend around the corner who does amazing, good and selfless works through his church.

The issues in the Middle East are complex and divisive but I suspect it is true that most people, whatever their religious persuasion (or none), are decent and want to live decent lives; it is the politicians, the fundamentalists and the terrorists who lead us to war and terror, not ordinary people.

Anyway as an atheist I was hugely moved by the whole morning. The trouble with people like me who don’t believe in god is that they don’t tend to get together once a week at local level and talk about moral dilemmas, organise things that help other people, fundraise for charity, support the sick members of their community, and share lunch. They may do other wonderful humanitarian things, but there isn’t a coming together in the same way, with other people locally. At least not that I’m aware of.

We had a couple of guys after lunch who did a wonderful collection of songs, part of the farewell celebration. Two men and a guitar, that’s all. They had performed at an interfaith event earlier in the week alongside muslims and christians and their songs, all in Hebrew and Yiddish, were marvellously uplifting and often beautiful. I loved it. You don’t have to be Jewish …

In the afternoon we sat in the garden with the Yoga Mama and drank tea and coffee and talked about ordinary things. Scout caught another mouse which was half dead and twitching and which it was my unhappy duty to put out of its misery (atheist turns euthanaseist so’s to speak). The Dizzle nursed a hangover and then we went out to eat Lebanese food. Good day.

I did find a couple of other good jokes whilst searching for atheist gags. This was my favourite. Nothing to do with religion and therefore one that we can all share.

A cruise liner sinks and one of the few groups to make it to shore are the entertainment team. Unfortunately the island they land on is inhabited by cannibals who kill them for food. Two of the cannibals share a stand up comic for dinner but after a few mouthfuls they look at each other doubtfully and one says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?”…

That’s all folks.