Real Grapes

Today I was working at a house in the neighborhood where I met one of its new residents. I was idly chatting about the back yard vegetation, all of which has been trimmed back recently. She surprised me when she said that the grape vines still needed to be cut further, and I said, "Well, sure you can cut them a bit more, but you'd want to leave the fruit."

"But these aren't real grapes that we can eat --are they?"

The vines have been neglected for a few years but they were clearly planted on purpose, along two sides of the porch. I'm no Ceridwen, so I can't guess which variety of grape it is by the tell-tale ant poops on the leaf stems, but "Yes, they'll be ripe in September and ready to eat," as I told her. The earlier residents probably planted them for making wine. But what else could I say? Yes they're plastic grape vines and unless you cut them they'll cover the entire house? She's a person of obvious intelligence; a young activist.

It was one of those moments of wonder, when we realize that there is no natural law that determines which things I'll know, and which you will know. A friend once suggested to me that we use motor oil to get a bonfire going, as he was out of kerosene. I just looked at him and thought about his words for a minute. Today Oprah Winfrey said something so profoundly dumb that I actually like her more for being so human. She remarked that people in India "still eat with their hands." I'm laughing again now as I write it. It boggles the mind. Yes, it's so strange that they make nuclear missiles but they can't comprehend forks --poor Oprah!

I recall that George W. Bush became US President before he visited Europe for the first time --now that is disturbing.

Of course I, and all of us, have blind spots in our minds that cover up vast swathes of the world's standing knowledge. I just thought I'd cherish the little moment.

By the way, can anyone tell me whether goats really eat cans?