There was a phone message today. A pre-recorded North American male voice said:

"This is to inform you, that HMRC is filing a law suit against you. Either press one, or call immediately on our department number 02032864682. I repeat 02032864682. Thank you."


Points for the unwary to note:

1) They didn't identify themselves, and didn't say that they were calling from, or for, HMRC. So don't make the mistake of thinking they did... as they hope you will do.

2) HMRC staff have North American accents? Maybe one or two do. Bit dubious.

3) They didn't identify "you", as they've haven't bothered to try and find out who might live at the location associated with your number. If your offspring answer the phone, are HMRC going to "file a lawsuit" against them?! If they were a bit more sophisticated, they might try to establish some identities, and information like National Insurance numbers. Should you (be daft enough to) speak to them, ask them the name and address of the person they're referring to.

3) Law suit - that's not a term used by the legal profession in the UK. Perhaps they'd like to give you the correct term. And while you're at it, check that they know what HMRC stands for.

4) Are you expecting HMRC to contact you? If so, it'll most likely be via post... unless you've been really bad, and they pay you a visit. Personally I've never been self-employed, and have never had to fill in a tax return. Nor have I ever been doing any sort of buying and/or selling type business - photos or anything. So can't think of any cause to be contacted by them.

5) Not obvious from the above, but was also recorded by the machine, there was an extra zero in front of the number quoted. That tells you it was an international call. A quick internet check on the 0020 code, reveals it came from somewhere in Egypt. Have HMRC moved their call centre off-shore? I doubt that. If you were to miss out that extra zero, and just use the number given, you may well end up ringing some poor innocent sod down South somewhere!

6) More internet research shows that there are variations on the message. USA citizens will be hear that the IRS (their equivalent to HMRC) is filing the law suit. And should you mad enough to phone and get through, you'll likely be offered the chance to stop the legal action by paying the (alleged) debt now. Just give them your credit card details, and they'll take your money... and as much of it as they possibly can!

= = = = = = = = = =

Many years ago, last millennium, my then fiancée (...long since, ex-wife) was "suckered in" by a call from America. A classic, of saying she'd won a load of money - carrot dangled - $50,000 for something she'd done whilst over there on holiday "Something she'd perhaps not even been aware of." And indeed, she wasn't. To transfer the money to her, they offered the easiest option of paying it in to her credit card account, "Just give us your card details." So she excitedly located the bag, and hauled out the card, or one of them...

Suspect the folk at the other end of the line were similarly excited... prior to my interception. And for a brief minute or two, I became very unpopular at both ends of the line. An American gent took over from lady that had been reeling in the victim, and asked to speak to me. "Sir, I can understand your concern. Why I too would be concerned about such a call. But myself, as an ex-police officer, can assure you, that this is totally legitimate." ...my ass it is buddy!

That was a close one...