The Spectator

 Good afternoon Olympic fans.  This is your roving reporter coming to you from Pacific Northwest Stadium.  I see we have an excited fan here.   Hello, sir.  Are you enjoying the competitions so far?
 
 “Yeah, wow."
 
"What’s your name, sir?"
 
“Buster”
 
"Well, Buster, it looks like you’ve been sitting here for quite some time."
 
"So far, I’ve seen two turtle relays and some sort of large bovine wrestling event, Australian cows, I think."
 
"So, you must be waiting for your favorite events.  May I ask what they are?"
 
“Small Bird Floor Routines and Rodent Races."
 
"Well, those are exciting events for sure, but if I may make an observation, you might be a little too close to the finish line.  The officials may ask you to move."
 
"Oh, I’m sure they won’t mind."
 
"Well, I could be wrong, but I don’t think you’re allowed to sit ON the finish line."
 
"Oh, dear, was I that close?  Sorry.  I’ll just scoot over here…….."
 
"You’re still on the finish line."
 
"Naaahhhh.  I think this is a good spot."

"Well, it looks to me as though you're actually on the course now."

"I don't think it'll matter.  No rodent is going get to the finish line."
 
Why is that?
 
"I don't know -- just a hunch."
 
 “SECURITY!!!!!”

 
For tomorrow, watch this space!  
     We'll be covering the very, very exciting Alternative "Special" Olympic games beginning in the aquatic venue with the always interesting and inspiring competition of goldfish with bladder difficulties.  This tragic, but manageable, condition causes the fish to swim upside down but word has it that they are plucky little creatures and having a wonderful time despite the difficulties they face.  You won't want to miss it, folks!