The unlucky man.

The man with £999 in his pocket stood at the bar,
drumming his nine fingers on the counter as the bar tender
poured him his ninth drink.
The unlucky man had just won the money in a poker game with triple 9s.
Suddenly, a man with a gun walked in, saw the lucky man and shot him.
Bang! The unlucky man was on the floor.
The gunman left. No-one moved.

The unlucky man stood up. 'I have nine lives' he said smugly.
And looking at a beautiful woman walking towards
him added 'and honey, fancy a shag?'
'Nein'. She replied.