Getting a little help.

Bonjour my tiny tots. I hope this week is being kind to you.

I am officially back at uni now. Beginning third year is quite daunting. Like you're supposed to have your shit together by now, which I very clearly do not.

Speaking of. Third year of university normally consists of writing a dissertation, and my course is no exception. 4,500 words of some sort of brilliant idea I have to imagine and write confidently about. Now you may be thinking 'wow that's hardly any words basically a long essay!' Yes to anyone you would think this would be mega easy, piece of cake. I actually haven't passed a written essay in uni yet. Yes I'm hopeless and tragic but what's even worse is the stigma attached to getting help.

There seems to be some sort of judgment when someone in the class needs a little more help than others. Like in school, when someone had a teachers assistant it meant they were stupid and they couldn't work out whatever we were getting taught. Now at uni, I so desperately wished I had help in English! But also, i honestly think university lecturers think everyone is just some genius who instantly knows what standard they have to be at. Some of us came from a small school with not a lot of artistic standards! Sorry I don't know what Picasso's sodding middle name is or why it's important that it's a 'Dale Chihuly' glass piece.

It's not like a struggle to write it's that I've written these bad boy blogs for so long that I write like I'm having a conversation. It's a growing issue. However! This year I am ever dedicated to ask for help, these folk get paid for us innocent students to get a little extra support and that's what I'm doing. Just because I'm in my final year doesn't mean I'm any more competent at writing essays when I do a craft based course. Sort of thought I'd got out it really.

So basically, I'm rubbish but I'm trying to sort it out because I'm not doing my best when I could be. The biggest temptation is to settle for less, because it's the easiest and quickest option.

Happy blipping.