a nice surprise...

..on this saturday

is a woodpecker, although type unknown but i don't mind not knowing -

as i continue on what has now become a 3 week journey of grief for my sister - and what is also

the 9 year anniversary of the death of my beloved daddy

every year on this anniversary date - i have written a letter here to daddy - sort of updating him as to how i am doing - how the past year has gone - what's new, you know just the things a princess daughter chats - with papa about - but with the recent passing of my sister - somehow it didn't feel right to do that this year - because i am now experiencing a new and - different kind of grief coupled with the - softening grief of his passing over these last years - one has been healing and i have gone through it - learning how to come to terms with it - reconciling it with my own life over this passage of time - with what my relationship had been with my daddy

while now there is this horribly new and tragic - kind of grief i am experiencing as a result of my sisters death - i haven't obviously come to terms with it yet - it's like an open wound - fresh and raw

so when i saw this tiny woodpecker this afternoon - it seemed perfect - both my daddy and sister loved birds - daddy would sit at the family room window 'bird watching' - trying to identify which birds were landing in our trees - then yelling out their names - "there's a bluebird, that's a robin, oh lookit that's an oriole" - he took such pride in being able to name them - while my sister was like me, she couldn't name them at all - yet she had great appreciation for their beauty - and the wide variety we would see together - as well as photos i would send her - i know they would adore this little one with his - smalll red tuft on his head - would agree with me that his 'size' was just right - clearly those two things along with it being a cute woodpecker - would be enough for all of us to make it...

a

happy day.....