Skull

Today is the first anniversary of my brain exploding, or to be precise, the occurrance of a sub-arachnoid haemorrhage which is a life-changing (or in 75% or so of cases, life-ending) event. Apparently I kept on blipping throughout; I have little or no recollection of that, although here is the evidence to prove it right in my journal. Blip has been a lifeline for me; concentrating on trying to document the most difficult of days, and following other journals, really did keep me going, and I'm sure has been instrumental in my being as far on the road to recovery as I am, although it is said you can never fully recover from this. Memory, concentration and sleep are poor, and I don't remember what it's like not to have a headache. I can fall asleep standing up but not sleep at night without waking several times in a panic. However I feel I have gained more than I have lost. I feel more accepting of people's foibles (except for those squealy kids in supermarkets of course); I appreciate the little things more and don't stress over what I cannot change; I have some small insight into the lives of people with neurological conditions and feel lucky not to have more serious problems; I have been made to realise that yes we will all die, and it's not so daunting after all - we avoid thinking about that because it's too awful, but as long as physical suffering is not involved, I think it is a natural thing and not to be feared. I started the day feeling rather numb and low - anniversaries of major life events such as the deaths of my parents always have that effect on me - but really today should be one of celebration. I bought this amethyst skull to mark the occasion.
Finally caught up with this week's entries, back-blipped from here.