You what?!

You sit at a desk and look at a screen all day, and receive 300 emails, and send 80, and take part on average to 4 conference calls a day with people in Yokohama, or Mumbai, or Warsaw, or Zilina, or Amsterdam, or Boston, or hopefully not Bellevue , because that would be a late one, and they don't really give a flying monkey's fart what time it is for you, and you half listen to them while reading some of your 300 emails, and you type some of your 80 others, and everybody is super excited, but everybody is expecting someone else to take a decision and actually do something, and then you have to do tons of reporting, for people who love to read reports, and you have meetings about how things urgently need to be done, and you hope that you will have a little bit of time to do them when the meetings about doing them are finished, and the minute the things are done, the people who love to read reports will want a report to see how the doing of things went. And once a month they transfer credits to your bank account, as a pat on the back for reading these thousands of emails, and writing a few hundred, and taking a decision from time to time, and reporting about it. 
Is that really what you do? No shit?! Wow. I am majorly impressed. I totally get it, you are the superior species on the planet. According to you. 
Me? What do I do? I float here, waiting for the women from the fish shop to throw me fish heads and fish bones. 
I float here, and I wait for my food. Sometimes I fart. Or I dive under the water and make funny bubbles through my nostrils. 
Hold on a second, where are you off to? Oh, you have a conference call starting in 7 minutes and you have to hurry back. Fair enough. Come back for a chat anytime, funny superior species, with the ridiculously small nostrils. Hold on a second, you wouldn't have a spare fish head by any chance? Iam feeling peckish.