The Botty Cough

The botty-cough is very rude 
To do before the Queen
For when assaulted by a smell
It's hard to stay serene

One must never botty-cough
In the presence of the Pope
And if the Pontiff lets one go
It's odourless, I hope

Please try not to botty-cough
At a Presidential meeting
And if a sound should emanate
Then blame it on the seating

I'm afraid that I once botty-coughed
When I met the Dalai Lama
But fortunately convinced him
That the smell was just his karma

The botty-cough is nature's way 
To remind us we're the same
And dogs, therefore, are nature's gift
To have someone to blame