Fishy Story

Some while back I subscribed to the UK Government email service on all matters Brexit. Until a few months ago it was a great service with about one email a month and thus manageable. However, in the last month or two, the mobile phone keeps buzzing every few hours to announce the latest news.

I really ought to turn it off as almost every email contains the same meaningless wording. "Today the PM/Ministers held useful roundtable discussions with the Xxxxxxx industry leaders at No 10 ......... and reassure ...... very special relationship with the EU ..... ".

Today got 5 emails from them but one caught my eye with the word "Aberdeen" in the title. Two Ministers had got off their London ministerial chairs and found their way there. In their own words "For the first time in many years the Government is holding its oil and gas summit here in Aberdeen, to listen to the sector and the wider business community".

Don't quite know why they should think Aberdeen has anything to do with oil and gas but these are strange times. The email did, however, let us into some chummy background - "Robert & Robin visited the "Granite City" to meet local businesses and leaders from the oil and gas, and fishing industries. They listened to local concerns and underlined the UK government's determination to get the best Brexit deal for people living and working in Aberdeen".

What great news for the starving people of Aberdeen but before they get their cake and eat it, I shot off to the supermarket to get in supplies of Scomber scombrus, a specialised fish in the Northern Brexit species. Luckily the shelves were still full. I couldn't find anywhere on the internet a UK supermarket stocking whole smoked mackerel to compare prices. The cheapest (Aldi/Tesco/Waitrose) smoked mackerel fillets seemed to be around £10/kg. My whole smoked mackerel cost €6,45/kg, I think equivalent to £5.30/kg.

On checking that it was regional Bavarian stream and pond stock I was horrified to read it was "stolen" from "North East Atlantic (North Sea/ west of Scotland)". I was quite good at Geography at school back in the days when threequarters of the Globe was British Empire Red and I admit that I haven't kept up to date- there must be at least a dozen cities on the nightly Sky News International weather temperature maps that I have never heard of - but quite how the North Sea and the West of Scotland get  put together took me back a bit. Back home I was however corrected by Wikipedia: while the North Sea is indeed between the UK eastern coast, Scandinavia, Holland, Germany, it is a marginal sea of the Atlantic Ocean.  Never too old to stop learning.

I took the mixed up fish as the Bavarian product was clearly sold out and proceeded to do the filleting or better getting as many bones out as possible before producing a large portion of smoked mackerel pate. From the taste, I couldn't determine whether it had been raised on east or west continental shelves. Perhaps the microplastic degraded by the mixer made the individual bouquet somewhat homogenous.  The cats and dogs enjoyed some of the less boney scraps,

This week there was a rather irritating TV report on the UK based charity "MSC" Marine Stewardship Council's blue logo that every fish product seems to be striving to have on its packaging. What seems to have started as a sensible non-profit charity to stop overfishing has seemingly turned into a large bureaucratic secretive society more interested in the royalty fees than a really effective environmental project.

The Portuguese tuna fishing boats that go out with 10 men each with one fishing rod and one hook are not supported as much as the factory fishing fleets using húge nets that can apparently include 100 (dead) dolphins each time the nets are raised and are yet MSC certified.

I don't personally know a lot about the subject and suspect somewhere there is a middle. It's a bit frightening though to see a ship containing tuna at a cannery wharf and taking one week to have its cargo unloaded. Just as it's frightening to hear a 1960s dairy farmer say that he was classed as a "large specialised dairy farmer" as he had 15 cows in the stable when the average was around 8 and he could sustain his 3 generation family on the income.

Well, I hope the UK fishing industry survives when they no longer export to Europe and I suspect my taste buds will get used to one of the other six varieties of the Scombrini tribe or perhaps the Scomber bavaricus will be back on the shelves.

In other news went to the GP again today and again no waiting to have my posterior injected with Vitamin B6 &12. Got told off for not coming to see them when I burnt my hand but apparently I had more or less done the right DIY treatment. Doc also "witnessed" a document for the UK Dept of Work & Pensions who again are checking up on me - quite probably because I am in some logarithm that says "1954 Trinidad born and UK resident from 1970 to 1990". Someone trying to catch their quota, no doubt. The form asked two financial (no medical) questions, one of which must be on their records and the second one on the German State Pensions records which they have full access to.

On the subject of "witnessing a signature" I have never understood the UK accepting such incredibly lax standards especially given the appaling state of any records of who is in the country. They asked that the above form is preferably signed by a doctor but could have been the local policeman (we don't have one). Applying for a UK passport, the signature of your qualified chiropodist is acceptable.

On my last 2016 passport renewal they strangely didn't ask for any witness but on the previous 2006 renewal, I got two colleagues at work to do it as they both had university "Dr" titles as Physicists. Here you can't get legal employment, healthcare or virtually any service unless you are registered with the parish council and who is responsible for issuing ID cards, passports, tax ID and which triggers getting a health card ID without which you can't get any healthcare. You can't get a driving licence, register a car or get car tax or insurance. You also have to deregister when you move and will only be accepted by another parish council when you produce the "Left" form. And I might add that in nearly 30 years here, I have never been asked to produce ID in a person spot check nor heard of any friend having to do so. The most likely check is of one's driving licence.