Kitties, Computers and Angry Gallbladders

I am currently laying in bed upstairs because it has been a rough night.  My life is pretty awesome, in my opinion, but that doesn't mean it's great all the time.  I have a family who I love and loves me, I have a job I am grateful for and provides meaning in my life, I have hobbies that are fulfilling, I live in a place that is immersed in beauty...I could go on and on with my gratitude list.  However, it's not all rainbows and puppies.  
I probably need to get my gallbladder removed and I will find that out for sure next week, and in the meantime I have attacks a few times a week and it's painful, to say the least.  It makes me angry.  I'm angry I can't laugh and be with my family.  I'm angry I can't be outside taking pictures.  I'm angry I'm in so much pain.  But this is where I'm at right now so I can find the silver lining or continue to be miserable physically and emotionally.  So, here's the silver lining-my daughter actually has to have surgery soon to get her tonsils removed and she has been very scared.  We have started talking about Mommy's angry gallbladder and Nug Bug's angry tonsils and how our organs just aren't happy inside our bodies anymore and the healthy thing to do is to let the doctor take them out.  I can't let her hang on me the way she likes to or hold her all the time right now, especially when an attack comes on, but I can support her in her fear and sadness and model what it looks like to walk through something scary.  I can show her that just because you cry it doesn't mean you aren't being brave.  Being brave means showing up and doing the work or walking through the fear while you are sobbing sometimes.  That's what it looked like tonight.  And being brave means following through on commitments even when it's tough and inconvenient and feels super vulnerable.  This isn't the picture or post I wanted to take or write tonight, but it's my life right now and I love my life.  Even the messy parts.