T3 time tunnel

Two American scientists are lost in the swirling maze of past and future ages, during the first experiments on America's greatest and most secret project, the Time Tunnel.

It’s already hot as we checkout of the Airbnb. By the time we get to the training room, near Hauptbahnhof, it’s getting unpleasant. We’re on the seventh floor of a Caritas building, in a lovely room - with aircon.

It takes us a while to get the room organised the way we want. And then, miracle upon miracle, everyone turns up on time. And we’re off.

During the morning Claire makes a revised offer for the flat. The counter offer comes in at lunchtime and the deal is off by tea-time. A few hundred quid poorer and a whole lot less stressed.

Gáspár gives me a lift to the airport. Claire says she’s going to cancel the John Lewis bed/sofa order. Tomorrow we will look at a rental property, but tonight she will drink wine. I fire up the laptop in the lounge and cancel the 3 Airbnb bookings that we’ve already taken for the flat. I cancel the listing too.

The flight is slightly delayed and very busy. I sleep through Desert Island Discs and doze to In Our Time. As I leave the baggage hall I buy a litre of Opir. At Sainsburys, Great Portland Place, I add a lemon and some olives to my luggage.

I throw the flat’s windows wide open, remove my sweaty shirt, and pour myself a large G&T. I watch Newsnight and then Ed Balls wandering glibly around Trumpland. The sight of him taking the persona of The British Bruiser in a Union Jack wrestling leotard is going to be hard to suppress. Yvette Cooper will be similarly scarred, no doubt.