Everyone's a critic

These were my two dining companions during lunch today, Noah and Imad. Imad becomes very distressed if he doesn't get to sit at the same table as me, so - in the name of a quiet life for the dinner ladies - we often end up sitting opposite one another.

The starter today was coleslaw, and Imad and I agreed that coleslaw is a particularly delicious dish. "I like all food," he said, "but carottes râpées (grated carrots with a dressing) is one of my favourites, and coleslaw is a bit like that."

The coleslaw arrived on our plates. Imad took a mouthful and then said, "It's nice... if a little piquant." He's six years old. D'aww.