For Mum

with Love X

I had a phone call with  Mum last night when she told me that the bone marrow cancer is once more growing, and growing extremely aggressively.  She had a scan a few days ago, and the Consultant has said that she needs more Chemotherapy.  It made her so ill last time with the side effects, but she has to have it to live she said....

(I went into work today, and I was fine until a programme wouldn't work for me...just because of that I got into floods of tears.  I hid away, but someone found me.  

They were very good to me, and my Boss sent me home...but now I worry about the repercussions next week :(   The girls told me never to apologise for tears of grief.  I didn't think it was grief, but maybe it is).

I will be the only one to attend my Uncle's funeral in my immediate family as my Mum is too ill, StepDad too elderly travel from Norfolk to Devon (he said himself) and anyway although they have good support who would look after Mum?  Mum is quite upset she can't go  We spent sometime talking about it last night...  My brother is abroad working so apparently he can't go either.

Its all too much sometimes, and I'm an emotional sort, so however much I try to keep the 'strong upper lip' it usually ends in tears :(

Sorry this is as it is but its from my heart....which grieves for my Uncle and in a way, although she's not yet gone, for my Mum....